In India, the youth is either choosing their life partners by themselves in a love marriage arrangement or getting the same approved by their parents thereby shaping it as an arranged marriage wherein parents are the ultimate decision-makers be it in a metropolitan city or otherwise. This duty comes with an unsaid pain of suffering in silence if the marriage doesn’t turn out to be successful or suffers any marital disagreement. At one hand, the son/husband is burdened with fighting frivolous and fictitious cases so filed by the wife in court; while on the other hand, the wife is busy blaming the husband’s parents by filing fake complaint, thereby unnecessarily dragging them into the police station or court, despite their seniority. This substantially affects and tarnishes the image and reputation so earned by the Husband’s parents in the society over years which result in pressure on their son to reach out an agreement amicably with his wife and file mutual divorce, or in some situations, even worse, to reopen a false case. The Parents are ultimate support system for the aggrieved and vice versa. However, when a man witnesses his parent’s confusion and fear, he loses his fighting spirit and becomes mentally and emotionally weak. And thus, parents play a very important role in preparing their sons for the legal battle ahead.
Whether arranged or love marriage, parents must recognize that their son has already made significant sacrifices during the marriage. At times, his parents mock him, saying things like, “You couldn’t handle your wife” or “You gave her too much freedom.” Such blame games are exactly what the wife intends to achieve within the husband’s family. If the parents fall into this trap, the wife’s motives have been achieved already as no son wants to see his parents to be the victims at the hands of his wife’s false cases that leads to immediate guilt trip and eventually makes the man weak and incapable of fighting the cases. Many families are currently facing false cases as a result of gender-biased laws that favors the wife. Your family is not a solitary one. As a result, parents must stop blaming their sons for their current situation.
Parents may love their daughter-in-law more than their son in some cases. They do everything they can to help her. They provide all the comfort and love they can muster. Despite this, when their daughter-in-law falsely accuses them and makes them accused or respondent in various criminal and civil cases, they enter a vicious cycle of negativity. “We have done so much for our daughter-in-law, why is she punishing us like this?” they reason. They sometimes worry that their daughter-in-law will arrest them or seize their property and assets. They sometimes feel envious when they see other happy families and reflect on how bad decisions they made. Regardless of these negative thoughts, parents must recognise that every family has its own set of issues. Every family experiences ups and downs. This is how life is. So, what if one marriage fails or one relationship fails? Do we stop living because of this? Instead of overthinking or negative thinking, parents can redefine their roles in their son’s life and assist him in preparing to fight this form of legal extortion and refuse to surrender to the pressures of paying large sums of money in the form of alimony and settlement.
Fighting court trials is a time-consuming process. Innocent husbands are subjected to various levels of rigour. This can suffocate their desire to advance professionally and personally. At this point, parents can step in and plant seeds of motivation in their son’s minds, encouraging him to take on a new project, learn a new technology, join a gym, improve his professional skills, or launch his new venture.
Nothing exacerbates the frustrations of a falsely trapped husband like incorrect or uninformed questions and advice from parents. Husbands frequently find themselves in even more legal trouble after being persuaded by their parents to take drastic measures. While parents should not expect to become legal experts overnight, studying a few basic acts such as IPC 498A, Domestic Violence Act (Protection of Women from Domestic Violence Act, 2005), CrPC 125, and others can help. This assistance will shape their perspective on their son’s legal difficulties. This will also assist parents in comprehending the complexities of the problem their son is facing. As a result, we recommend that all parents read such bare acts in their native language to gain a better understanding of how their daughter-in-law is abusing the law.
It is no longer a secret that the laws and legislations as of now favour women, and wives abuse the same to gain a bargaining advantage in negotiations that becomes unfair for the parents of the husband who may take it to the streets with banners and placards someday to seek their rights. However, connecting with like-minded parents or parents of other victims’ sons can often be beneficial. Not only does it help to de-stress the trauma of the false cases, but such discussions and ‘quiet activism’ can also help expose and uproot evils like feminism-sponsored legal terrorism from society more quickly. Parents should consider discussing the misuse of laws in their families and society as a whole. When the parents of male victims begin to openly discuss false cases, the social perception shifts and people come out to support them. There is a need for the government at the central level to amend existing gender-biased laws and create new laws and acts to punish false accusers sooner rather than later.
GOVT NEEDS TO WAKE UP TO SUCH DOUBLE STANDARD GENDER BIAS LAWS MADE FOR THE PROTECTION OF GENUINELY AGGRIEVED WOMENS, RATHER THAN THOSE WHO USE IT TO SETTLE PERSONAL SCORES OF LEGAL EXTORTIONS.